This morning as soon as I woke up I wrote this status on Facebook:
"I actually watched Eric Garner die last night. I read about it and saw the video circulating but I couldn't bare to watch it. I finally did last night and I had the worst sleep. I barely slept. It was as horrible as everyone described. I couldn't believe he died like that. He said "I can't breathe" about 3 times and those NYPD officers kept choking him till he was lifeless. At one point an officer joined in to rest his knee on his head or neck. Those words "I can't breathe" were in my head throughout my slumber and I kept jumping out of my sleep, but at least I get to wake up. R.I.P. Eric Garner. A black husband and father is lost senselessly."
I am feeling every kind of messed up about what happened to this man. I REALLY didn't sleep well. I was afraid of what I would see so I relied on social media and articles but I told a friend about it last night who had no clue it had happened and we ended up watching it together. And what I saw was a savage and complete disregard for that man's life from start to finish. How do you hear someone say "I can't breathe" repeatedly and NOT release them from a headlock or choke hold? I think they meant to kill him, but that's just my opinion right? But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe that big burly 400 pound black man really was a threat and deserved to be choked out and mobbed by 8 or more police officers, NOT! Those NYPD officers knew what they were doing was dead wrong.
I want to cry but I can't. Not because I don't care but because I literally can't cry and that's because I'm SO angry at what happened. I found the full length video with the aftermath and BAWLED! That shit was so damn pointless that I still can't believe it happened. I'm not functioning normally right now and actually had to get out of the house today because I didn't want to be inside feeling like this. I get chills every time I flash back to that video; I can never watch it again. I have a heavy heart for him and his family because I know they feel infinity times worse than I can ever feel. I wish Eric Garner's family all the condolences in the world. I pray that one day they can come to terms or as close to it as possible for their own collective sanity. I pray for justice for Eric Garner because he was clearly murdered.
Rest In Peace Eric Garner